Stop Telling Yourself To Move On If You Want A Better Life

Photo by shagun malhotra on Unsplash

You’re not doing yourself any favours if you’re telling yourself to get over it and move on.

I hate to be the one to burst your bubble, but if you really want to live a happy life, it’s true.

I have lost count the number of times I have muttered to yours truly to pull myself together, forget what happened and get on with it. I have lost count how many times someone else has told me to pull myself together and get on with it.

The fact is, pulling myself together and “getting on with it” isn’t helpful. Nor is it conducive to living a happy life. The reality is, if I am not making myself aware of the feelings a given situation or person has stirred in me, how can I learn and grow to be the best version of me?

In my experience, “pulling myself together and getting on with it”, is synonymous with acting out the proverbial ostrich syndrome. Burying our head in the sand, ignoring what is going on around us is far more damaging to our health and wellbeing.

So why do we do it?

I must admit, I have found it so much easier in the short term to just deal with challenges, problems, whatever you want to call them, by ignoring them. How many times have I heard myself say, “Shit happens”, so matter of factly?

It’s crazy.

Yes, shit happens, and yes it can be crappy, but ignoring what is actually going on inside our heads is a detrimental step to living a happy life.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for being positive, and indeed I spent a chunk of time trying to manifest being one hundred per cent positive, one hundred per cent of the time.

It was a ludicrous challenge that only I could have set myself. I was ridiculous or naive, thinking I could wistfully create a happy life by changing my thoughts to be consistently upbeat.

What’s the answer?

Learning and embracing in its entirety how to accept, is the key to happiness.

We often find ourselves trying to make sense of what is going on around us, trying to make sense of why that one person we love so much has just ripped our heart into pieces with their behaviour.